Stressed About Your Wedding? Here’s How to Stay Present and Enjoy It

Tips by AisleTalk’s Wedding Therapists

pexels kaan 2403569

It’s the time-tested refrain we hear from clients at every post-wedding recap session: “It all went by so fast!” So, if you’re a bride or groom-to-be, you might be reading this and wondering…

Why does your wedding day go by so fast?

And it makes sense. Most couples today take around a year or longer (thanks, COVID) to plan this large-scale event for their friends and family. You spend nearly every day of the last 350+ or so, considering each small detail of this milestone moment, only to have it feel like it came and went in the blink of an eye. Before you know it, you’re starting your day at 8 am and it’s already 8 pm. After months of planning, it can feel like a complete shock when all your hard work gets summed up in a day. All the time, effort, and energy dedicated to finding the perfect outfits, the best decor, colors, and who’s going to sit where– and you might find yourself wondering if you were even able to enjoy the results of your own labor.  

There is so much decision-making and responsibility leading up to the wedding and there is also so much happening on the actual day. No matter what you have on your day-of timeline and your vision for how you want the plan to go, a lot can get thrown at you in that final planning stretch, even on the day of your wedding. 

You might be communicating with multiple people, coordinating vendors, all while trying to follow a timeline to be prompt and ready for all the big moments. With all this going on, it is inevitable that we will lose track of time, and before you know it, the final song is playing and a year or more of planning is over too.

So this leads us to ask: 

Is it even possible to slow down time on the day of your wedding? And if so, how can you do it?! 

At AisleTalk, we have developed strategies to help brides and grooms think about the smaller snapshots on this bigger day. The key is incorporating elements of mindfulness, focusing specifically on “present-moment awareness.” In this blog, we’re discussing these tips for how to remain focused and present on your wedding day a.k.a. our little work-around for slowing down time on your wedding day!

1. Have a conversation about expectations of the day and come up with a plan of what you and your partner want to enjoy together. 

We’ve heard countless stories about the wedding day holding different meanings and weight for individuals. For some, it can be challenging to think about this day as a happy occasion; there is often stress, loss, and grief tied to this day. For others, it is a day to hold a large party, to enjoy the day to its fullest with friends and family, or it can be a way to celebrate how a couple has overcome hardships and challenges in their relationship. The list goes on, but what is most important is being able to express these expectations with your partner leading up to your wedding day. 

You can do this by taking a moment to sit together, to talk about what each person is looking forward to, and what this event means for each of you. You may be thinking, “I don’t have time for this! I have a wedding coming up.” But carving out just 20 minutes (or an hour if you have it!) can make all the difference in potential conflicts with your partner and loved ones due to misaligned expectations. 

AisleTalk wedding therapists recommend one topic to explore in particular: Think about how you envision the time spent with your partner on your wedding day. This is especially important for the reception and post-ceremony time. One common experience we hear from couples is about the post-wedding frustration that comes as a result of feeling like they had been unintentionally pulled away from each other throughout the evening. Someone wants to toast you in one corner, while the other is taking a photo with a group across the room. A groom runs to the restroom and gets wrapped into a conversation with family from out of town, while the bride is dancing to their favorite song by herself. 

Though this happens easily and honestly, a simple plan to combat it ahead of time, is often all you need! Talk with your fiancé about: 

  • Are you a couple who typically attends a social gathering and splits up throughout the night? Consider that, on your wedding night, you may want to approach it differently – so that you can walk away with more of a shared experience than remembering it so differently from each other. 

  • What might be an obstacle for staying together? What is a solution that helps with that? For most, the biggest issue is that we want to spend time with the people who have traveled to see us AND we want to be with our new spouse! Totally understandable. A common solution here is being intentional about spending quality catch-up time with your friends and family, especially those who have traveled far, during the events that lead up to the wedding and reception. That way, you can prioritize the shared experience with your newlywed on the wedding night. 

  • Coming up with a code word or phrase when one of you is “stuck” in conversation and it’s time to move along.

  • Identifying a few moments that you anticipate you and your partner would absolutely like to do together or enjoy together. 

  • Identifying moments that could warrant a realistic moment of separation. 

  • Offering grace that all of this doesn’t mean you’ll be attached at the hip! Just make your best effort.
pexels tahaasamett 13534756

2. Plan to trade in your planning hat for your party hat.

At some point, it will be time to transition out of your wedding planner identity, so that you can fully enjoy your event as the guest of honor – not the setup crew. This is a point that from now on, you leave everything to the capable professionals and helpers you’ve assigned, and you no longer have intel on the behind-the-scenes. If something doesn’t go to plan, leave it to your planner to resolve it and let them work their planner magic! It is officially above your paygrade to be involved at that level now.

From now on, you are to bask in the light of this celebration that is for you, and enjoy it with the other person it is for; the person you are celebrating a new life with.

How do we do this? Pick a day at some point before your wedding festivities really get going.

This could be a day during the week of your wedding, two days or even a day beforehand, after you ensure that all major tasks and decisions no longer need to be made. Oftentimes there is always something else we could be doing to tweak and perfect for until the last minute, so if you find yourself doing that, you may have to choose a time and tell yourself you are DONE!

Then, add a little intentionality to it! Maybe even a visual representation of this act of choosing to take off your planning hat and replace it with your bride/groom hat. Instead, you get to focus on just being the bride or just being the groom. This can mean taking time to participate in relaxing or self-soothing activities, including pampering yourself before the wedding day. It can also mean spending quality time with your partner or friends and family for just a little bit before the busy day takes you away. This is not to say that stressors won’t come up or you’ll be completely stress-free, however it can help to slow down in the last few days that can feel overwhelming or chaotic. 

pexels koolshooters 8534279

3. Try a Grounding Exercise 

A final tip for the wedding day involves slowing down, pausing, and taking a look around you. How can you slow this moment down when everything around you is moving so rapidly? 

We ask our brides and grooms to partake in a sensory experience. This exercise is a mental reset that can ground you to the present moment, especially when anxiety or overwhelm begin to take over. It’s a simple yet powerful tool to bring you back to reality; sometimes we can be stuck in the past (what went wrong during wedding planning?!) or stuck in the future (I have so much to do this after this!). This exercise can help you focus on what is going on at this moment. 

So try it– The Five Sensory Snapshot: Wedding Edition! 

What are the things you can see? 
  • Can you notice the smiles on your parents’ faces? 
  • Can you notice your friends getting ready alongside you?
  • How about the colors in your centerpieces? 
What are the things you can feel or touch? 
  • Can you notice how it feels to have your hair done? 
  • Can you notice the sensation when you touch the embroidery or pattern on your dress? 
  • How about the sensation of the brushes touching your face as you get makeup? 
What are the things you can hear? 
  • Can you notice when your favorite song is playing? 
  • Can you notice the laughter on the dance floor? 
  • How about the whispers and “awes” when you exchange your vows? 
What are the things you can smell?
  • Can you notice how your bouquet smells? 
  • Can you notice how the season smells when you step outside (Spring blooms, freshly cut grass)? 
What are the things you can taste?  
  • Can you notice the taste of your wedding cake? 
  • Can you notice the taste of your favorite drink?
  • How about the flavors of your favorite foods? 

Though we can’t stop time completely, there are ways we can slow it down and not make it go by even faster. We invite you to try one (or more!) of these strategies on your wedding day – or maybe even practice at a pre-wedding event. Don’t forget to share them with your fiancé, so you’re on the same page! 

We recognize all of the challenges that come with planning a wedding, the stress of your wedding day, being part of a large-scale event, and we are also here for the post-wedding reflections. If you want to learn more about staying present or grounded, or preparing for a busy wedding day, reach out to us for a consultation! The AisleTalk team can work with you to figure out your needs and support you to your wedding and after. 

Published on

June 2, 2025

Feeling Stressed About Wedding Planning?

You're not alone—and you don’t have to go through it alone either. Whether you're newly engaged, navigating family dynamics, or feeling overwhelmed by decisions, our licensed therapists are here to help you feel grounded, confident, and connected throughout your journey.

Let’s talk

Stressed About Your Wedding? Here’s How to Stay Present and Enjoy It

Tips by AisleTalk’s Wedding Therapists

pexels kaan 2403569

It’s the time-tested refrain we hear from clients at every post-wedding recap session: “It all went by so fast!” So, if you’re a bride or groom-to-be, you might be reading this and wondering…

Why does your wedding day go by so fast?

And it makes sense. Most couples today take around a year or longer (thanks, COVID) to plan this large-scale event for their friends and family. You spend nearly every day of the last 350+ or so, considering each small detail of this milestone moment, only to have it feel like it came and went in the blink of an eye. Before you know it, you’re starting your day at 8 am and it’s already 8 pm. After months of planning, it can feel like a complete shock when all your hard work gets summed up in a day. All the time, effort, and energy dedicated to finding the perfect outfits, the best decor, colors, and who’s going to sit where– and you might find yourself wondering if you were even able to enjoy the results of your own labor.  

There is so much decision-making and responsibility leading up to the wedding and there is also so much happening on the actual day. No matter what you have on your day-of timeline and your vision for how you want the plan to go, a lot can get thrown at you in that final planning stretch, even on the day of your wedding. 

You might be communicating with multiple people, coordinating vendors, all while trying to follow a timeline to be prompt and ready for all the big moments. With all this going on, it is inevitable that we will lose track of time, and before you know it, the final song is playing and a year or more of planning is over too.

So this leads us to ask: 

Is it even possible to slow down time on the day of your wedding? And if so, how can you do it?! 

At AisleTalk, we have developed strategies to help brides and grooms think about the smaller snapshots on this bigger day. The key is incorporating elements of mindfulness, focusing specifically on “present-moment awareness.” In this blog, we’re discussing these tips for how to remain focused and present on your wedding day a.k.a. our little work-around for slowing down time on your wedding day!

1. Have a conversation about expectations of the day and come up with a plan of what you and your partner want to enjoy together. 

We’ve heard countless stories about the wedding day holding different meanings and weight for individuals. For some, it can be challenging to think about this day as a happy occasion; there is often stress, loss, and grief tied to this day. For others, it is a day to hold a large party, to enjoy the day to its fullest with friends and family, or it can be a way to celebrate how a couple has overcome hardships and challenges in their relationship. The list goes on, but what is most important is being able to express these expectations with your partner leading up to your wedding day. 

You can do this by taking a moment to sit together, to talk about what each person is looking forward to, and what this event means for each of you. You may be thinking, “I don’t have time for this! I have a wedding coming up.” But carving out just 20 minutes (or an hour if you have it!) can make all the difference in potential conflicts with your partner and loved ones due to misaligned expectations. 

AisleTalk wedding therapists recommend one topic to explore in particular: Think about how you envision the time spent with your partner on your wedding day. This is especially important for the reception and post-ceremony time. One common experience we hear from couples is about the post-wedding frustration that comes as a result of feeling like they had been unintentionally pulled away from each other throughout the evening. Someone wants to toast you in one corner, while the other is taking a photo with a group across the room. A groom runs to the restroom and gets wrapped into a conversation with family from out of town, while the bride is dancing to their favorite song by herself. 

Though this happens easily and honestly, a simple plan to combat it ahead of time, is often all you need! Talk with your fiancé about: 

  • Are you a couple who typically attends a social gathering and splits up throughout the night? Consider that, on your wedding night, you may want to approach it differently – so that you can walk away with more of a shared experience than remembering it so differently from each other. 

  • What might be an obstacle for staying together? What is a solution that helps with that? For most, the biggest issue is that we want to spend time with the people who have traveled to see us AND we want to be with our new spouse! Totally understandable. A common solution here is being intentional about spending quality catch-up time with your friends and family, especially those who have traveled far, during the events that lead up to the wedding and reception. That way, you can prioritize the shared experience with your newlywed on the wedding night. 

  • Coming up with a code word or phrase when one of you is “stuck” in conversation and it’s time to move along.

  • Identifying a few moments that you anticipate you and your partner would absolutely like to do together or enjoy together. 

  • Identifying moments that could warrant a realistic moment of separation. 

  • Offering grace that all of this doesn’t mean you’ll be attached at the hip! Just make your best effort.
pexels tahaasamett 13534756

2. Plan to trade in your planning hat for your party hat.

At some point, it will be time to transition out of your wedding planner identity, so that you can fully enjoy your event as the guest of honor – not the setup crew. This is a point that from now on, you leave everything to the capable professionals and helpers you’ve assigned, and you no longer have intel on the behind-the-scenes. If something doesn’t go to plan, leave it to your planner to resolve it and let them work their planner magic! It is officially above your paygrade to be involved at that level now.

From now on, you are to bask in the light of this celebration that is for you, and enjoy it with the other person it is for; the person you are celebrating a new life with.

How do we do this? Pick a day at some point before your wedding festivities really get going.

This could be a day during the week of your wedding, two days or even a day beforehand, after you ensure that all major tasks and decisions no longer need to be made. Oftentimes there is always something else we could be doing to tweak and perfect for until the last minute, so if you find yourself doing that, you may have to choose a time and tell yourself you are DONE!

Then, add a little intentionality to it! Maybe even a visual representation of this act of choosing to take off your planning hat and replace it with your bride/groom hat. Instead, you get to focus on just being the bride or just being the groom. This can mean taking time to participate in relaxing or self-soothing activities, including pampering yourself before the wedding day. It can also mean spending quality time with your partner or friends and family for just a little bit before the busy day takes you away. This is not to say that stressors won’t come up or you’ll be completely stress-free, however it can help to slow down in the last few days that can feel overwhelming or chaotic. 

pexels koolshooters 8534279

3. Try a Grounding Exercise 

A final tip for the wedding day involves slowing down, pausing, and taking a look around you. How can you slow this moment down when everything around you is moving so rapidly? 

We ask our brides and grooms to partake in a sensory experience. This exercise is a mental reset that can ground you to the present moment, especially when anxiety or overwhelm begin to take over. It’s a simple yet powerful tool to bring you back to reality; sometimes we can be stuck in the past (what went wrong during wedding planning?!) or stuck in the future (I have so much to do this after this!). This exercise can help you focus on what is going on at this moment. 

So try it– The Five Sensory Snapshot: Wedding Edition! 

What are the things you can see? 
  • Can you notice the smiles on your parents’ faces? 
  • Can you notice your friends getting ready alongside you?
  • How about the colors in your centerpieces? 
What are the things you can feel or touch? 
  • Can you notice how it feels to have your hair done? 
  • Can you notice the sensation when you touch the embroidery or pattern on your dress? 
  • How about the sensation of the brushes touching your face as you get makeup? 
What are the things you can hear? 
  • Can you notice when your favorite song is playing? 
  • Can you notice the laughter on the dance floor? 
  • How about the whispers and “awes” when you exchange your vows? 
What are the things you can smell?
  • Can you notice how your bouquet smells? 
  • Can you notice how the season smells when you step outside (Spring blooms, freshly cut grass)? 
What are the things you can taste?  
  • Can you notice the taste of your wedding cake? 
  • Can you notice the taste of your favorite drink?
  • How about the flavors of your favorite foods? 

Though we can’t stop time completely, there are ways we can slow it down and not make it go by even faster. We invite you to try one (or more!) of these strategies on your wedding day – or maybe even practice at a pre-wedding event. Don’t forget to share them with your fiancé, so you’re on the same page! 

We recognize all of the challenges that come with planning a wedding, the stress of your wedding day, being part of a large-scale event, and we are also here for the post-wedding reflections. If you want to learn more about staying present or grounded, or preparing for a busy wedding day, reach out to us for a consultation! The AisleTalk team can work with you to figure out your needs and support you to your wedding and after. 

Published on

June 2, 2025