The start of a new year can bring the urge to reset with new goals, habits, and self-improvement strategies. Social media, especially TikTok, has everything. Funny baby videos, viral dances, wedding planning vlogs, but also lots and lots of therapy talk. Whether it’s an influencer talking about relationships by emphasizing boundaries and red flags, or a PhD-level researcher discussing attachment styles, there’s a wide variety of information out there. Some of it’s well-researched fact, some of it is clickbait, so let’s parse through the noise to address what is actually worth taking into account.
Why It’s Appealing
First, let’s acknowledge that regardless of their relevance or accuracy, #TherapyTok videos are easy to get sucked into.
Psychology concepts are presented in easily digestible clips and the short-form nature means that your brain gets a constant stream of novelty and validation with dopamine hits, the “feel-good” neurotransmitter, from each swipe that can be addictive.
Each fast-paced video provides a bit of insight, connection, or reassurance that all humans want and crave as social beings.
This style of content can create the illusion of progress and growth. As we venture through this holiday engagement season, gear up for wedding season, and all the resolutions for the new year, stress is often high and people are searching for guidance or reassurance. These videos can also provide validation to the viewer’s experience. For example, if you’ve just gone through a fight with your mother-in-law, it can feel encouraging to see someone explain “boundaries” and “narcissism,” and attribute the fault to the other person. The more you watch, the more you recognize from your own life, which continues this feedback loop and can reinforce self-diagnosis behaviors.
Why It Can Be Harmful
The problem with TikTok therapy is that, unlike real life mental health therapy spaces, it is completely unregulated; and therefore much of the content ends up being created by unqualified creators. When you go to see a doctor, it’s important to ensure that they have the proper credentials to be giving you a diagnosis. However, on TikTok, many people can market themselves as “Life Coaches” or “Self-Help Experts” without receiving proper training. As a result, we might get the misuse of terms, unethical advice, or broad sweeping generalizations that lack the nuance developed after years of proper training.
Mental health is complex. True growth requires introspection, trial and error, and guidance that can’t be accomplished overnight. TikTok is full of quick-fix advice, promising instant solutions for anxiety, stress, or relationship struggles, but real life doesn’t work that way.
You might be planning behavioral changes for the New Year. These New Year’s resolutions take weeks or months of regular practice, not a single scroll. Just as a wedding vlog can be condensed into 60 seconds of highlights, social media presents only the polished, easiest parts of a process, glossing over the unsexy, sometimes messy work that actually creates lasting change. Relying on TherapyTok’s oversimplified solutions can leave people frustrated, comparing themselves to curated stories, and feeling like they’re failing when real progress inevitably takes time, patience, and sometimes professional guidance.
Mental health is also personal. One-size-fits-all advice can be misleading, or even harmful. Videos on TikTok often present rigid rules: “If he doesn’t text back in 2 hours, he’s not emotionally available” or “If you feel anxious in this situation, you struggle with emotional regulation.” While these statements are catchy and shareable, they can actually reinforce the common cognitive distortion of black-and-white thinking, making nuanced situations feel like evidence of a serious problem. Over time, this can create negative cognitive habits and lead people to base important decisions about relationships, self-care, or boundaries on other people’s standards rather than their own needs and values.
Normal is boring on social media. As a result, there can be a tendency to diagnose behavior that is…simply normal. For example, someone who is stressed, overwhelmed, or struggling to communicate in the chaos might be labeled as having an avoidant attachment style. Because apparently, stressing over seating charts, debating which adult should sit at the kids’ table, or dreading the tasks on your wedding to-do list is now a reflection of your deepest emotional wounds. TherapyTok can amplify this comparison, turning normal human stress into a diagnostic checklist, which can make people feel worse instead of supported.
How To Use TherapyTok Safely
- Follow licensed professionals: Look for creators with clear credentials, such as LMHC, (Licensed Mental Health Counselor), LMFT (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist), LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker), or PsyD (Doctor of Psychology). Licensed professionals are trained to provide evidence-based guidance and are more likely to offer nuanced, responsible advice. Content from unverified sources may be entertaining or satisfying, but can be misleading or even harmful if taken as fact.
- Check for nuance: Healthy mental health content should acknowledge complexity and that everyone’s situations may be different. Phrases like “this may be a sign of…” suggest possibilities and encourage self-reflection, whereas absolutes like “this always means…” oversimplify human behavior and can reinforce black-and-white or all-or-nothing thinking.
- Treat content as a conversation starter, not a diagnosis: Think of TikTok videos as prompts for discussion rather than concrete conclusions about your situation. Especially during high-stress periods like wedding planning or the start of a new year, it’s easy to misinterpret advice as universal truth. If a video resonates with you, consider it an opportunity to explore your feelings or communication patterns, rather than labeling yourself or someone else based on what you watched. Once you’ve reflected on your own, if you’re considering any significant change, discuss it with someone you trust or knows you well like a dear friend, trusted partner, or therapist.
TikTok “therapy” can feel validating, entertaining, and insightful but quick-fixes, one-size-fits-all advice, and viral trends can sometimes do more harm than good, especially during high-stress times like wedding planning or New Year transitions. True growth takes nuance, reflection, and individualized guidance, not 60-second videos.
AisleTalk offers therapy and coaching for your relationship’s biggest moments — from breakups and new beginnings to wedding stress, premarital conversations, and the everyday work of balancing family, life, love, and loss. Even the most meaningful seasons can carry unexpected strain.
If this resonates, we invite you to book a free intro call with our team to learn more about working together.
